Professional Communication Protocol

Of late, I have had opportunities to interact with various people across the globe. And I am only referring to communications over the phone/web messengers. Invariably, the first piece of communication would be a question form the caller to the receiver:

 “Hi receiver! How are you doing?”

So what’s special in this? Well nothing yet. Let’s continue…

From the answers I have received and also the one’s I put up in response to the greeting, it almost always has to be one of the following:

 Hi caller! I am doing ‘Good’. How about you?

 Hi caller! I am ‘OK’. How about you?

 ‘Not bad’. How about you? (Notice ‘Hi caller’ being dropped!)

Needless to say, ‘receiver’ would also respond in a similar way.

Now let me take the opportunity to briefly put up what each of these actually mean:

Expression   => What the person says.

Explanation => What the person actually means.

Expression: I am doing ‘Good’

Explanation:  Surprisingly, everything seems to be under control. I am not used to such situations but it has somehow been magically conjured and there’s a high chance that after this particular call, it may not remain the same. Whatever, let’s continue.

Expression: I am doing ‘OK’

Explanation: I am barely managing to keep up to speed with the happenings. Something seems to be terribly wrong and I am afraid, as we speak, it may go hay wire! I am struggling hard to figure out that ‘something’ since morning. It would be great if could help me do so.

Expression: ‘Not bad’

Explanation: Well too bad! It couldn’t get any worse. Nothing seems to be as it should be. It would be great if I was left alone. But let’s continue. Since I am already overloaded, please be aware that anything new which comes up will safely overflow!

It’s important to note that no one ever says, “I am doing great!” or “I am doing fantastic!”. Neither does one say “I am doing too bad!” or “I am screwed up!” And this is why I had to formulate the above theory.

All this just means, people are too good to trouble with their problems.

Is it???